I don’t know if what I am is manic
When I spill all over the place
Seem to spatter onto whatever I can find for canvas
Wild, sporadic
Without reason, but with intent
But the calculations run in the background
Hidden from me
Negative space
Writing this i am aware i am mixing metaphors
I am trying to decide if i care
I care too much and what I mean by that is i care too little
Grilling away at the smallest details
I lost where I started.
Sometimes, I step in or outside of myself and wonder how I got here, look around my room and wonder who chose to put that picture on the wall, or who drank that tea?
Not me.