I am wavering. Loving kindness has only gotten me so far.  Rage bubbles to the surface.  Rage which washes over my entire being and wraps itself around my soul. This rage is armour. This rage shields me from the earth shaking ignorance which constantly attacks my being.

Today, I managed to press this rage down.  I massaged the knots growing inside and I let them dissipate.

Then I heard those words.  Words which shot my rage to the surface and threw it like a force-field around me, throwing everyone and everything back; I flew from where I sat and spat out my dissent. How dare they utter those words in my presence ?! Do not ever utter that sentence again. It is baffling to me that they tried to justify the utterance. How dare they?! How dare they.  I know how they dare. I am reminded every day. Every. Single. Day. My rage covers me. My rage protects me.

Loving kindness can wait, today, my rage keeps me safe.