I see her separate from the crowd 

I know that it is too much for her 

She has just lost a piece of her soul 

Not some miniscule chip, 

But a gaping chunk ripped cruelly from her chest 

I hesitate, then walking over to her  

I watch her light a cigarette. 

Eyes cast down, vacant 

Lowering myself beside her 

I know I am among the last  

People she wants to be near her 

This night has been too much  

These people have been too much 

I want to take away her pain

That is a thing which is impossible

But the desire sits within me nonetheless 

I rest my head against her shoulder 

 Asking softly, ‘what can I do?’ 

‘Just go home’ she says  

I nod, knowing that is not what she wants

That is not what I want 

I want to cradle her in my arms 

Tell her ‘come sleep with me tonight, 

We can put on a movie and you can sob 

Until sleep takes you in.’   

That is not my job anymore 

 That is not what she wants from me 

That is not what she needs.  

So I nod my head and rise from the stoop 

I say ‘take care of you, good night.’ 

Walking away I stare up at the moon 

Its’ silvery light casts a glow upon my face 

I think of you, I think of how happy you would be 

To see the people you love gathered for you 

Missing you.  I think you’d laugh though  

You’d laugh at the people who you barely know 

Who have come out and probably don’t even know 

Your last name.   

I am afraid that I am one of those people 

One of those pretenders, because I didn’t know you long 

I didn’t get to experience all of the wonderful things you had to offer 

I think that, but then I remember the times that we did spend together 

I remember the first day we met, I remember the dancing,

The laughing, the singing, I remember you. 

I miss you.  

So I wander down the street and I channel your presence 

And I give thanks to you. 

I give thanks for you. 

Then, I lower myself into my vehicle, 

Start the engine, and drive.  

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